Spitballin’ (or Super Pass It To Bulis: All In, if you love adventurous acronymizing) is a feature that allows us to touch on a multitude of things really fast, because in the world of hockey, there are always lots of things to find and colour. Here are a few quick topics.
The Capitals didn't respect Henrik's shot, like, at all
I can't stop watching Henrik Sedin's goal versus Washington. It's amazing to see how little respect teams have for his shot. Look how wide open he is here, and look how slowly Branden Holtby comes across to cut off the post. No one expects him to shoot, let alone get the shot off so quickly.
In Washington's defence, Henrik is so anti-shooting, he split into two people and made the copy play the wing and do all of his shooting. And heck, even the copy would prefer to let someone else shoot.
In this case, that someone else is Radim Vrbata, to whom all passes flow. Check out the way Washington's penalty-kill box shades towards Vrbata's wall. They know what's up. (This probably helps to explain Vrbata's early-season struggles, too. After an All-Star season in a Canadian market, teams are a lot more aware of him than before.)
Let's hope this was the first sign of the Canucks adjusting to the opposition's adjustments. If Henrik is gifted that kind of room, he needs to shoot more. He should probably shoot more anyway. OR, the Canucks could put Yannick Weber back in the lineup to give the power play a different look, and make teams think twice about just surrounding Vrbata. But what do I know?
Daniel's goal song is a rerun
While we're talking Sedin goals, let's talk about Daniel's song: Clutch's "Electric Worry". You may recall that number from two years ago, when the Canucks used it as their goal song. Then they retired it. Now it's back, for just Daniel. Why? Did he like it that much?
Probably not. As the Canucks explained when they introduced the personalized goal song concept, the Sedins couldn't have care less:
Others, like Daniel and Henrik Sedin and Alex Edler, said they didn’t really care, they’ve enjoyed what has played in the past. Those easy-going Swedes, I tell ya.
Little did we know that this meant a retread of an old song, providing more evidence for my theory that this whole thing is a bad idea. On the bright side, if the Sedins and Edler are just going to pick songs they've heard before (because, as eternal wizards, modern music is a strange, foreign concept to them), there's still hope for a great pick: maybe Edler's enough of a secret troll to have chosen Chelsea Dagger?
Kevin Bieksa is Kevin Bieksa
The Anaheim Ducks, the popular Stanley Cup pick, are off to an ugly 1-4-1 start. So too is former Canuck Kevin Bieksa, who has no points through six games despite being second on the team in icetime. He's also minus-5. Now, on the one hand, plus/minus is often a bum stat, but on the other and, minus-4 of that minus-5 comes from one game -- Thursday night's 5-1 loss to the Nashville Predators. When you're minus-4 in a night, I'm saying plus/minus matters.
Bieksa has his moments, but as Canucks fans know all too well, he also has his moments. It's a big part of why Jim Benning decided, after a year of Bieksa, that the blueliner had to go. It was the right time, as Bieksa is currently benefiting from Reputation Lag™, a hockey phenomenon in which it takes two years for your reputation to catch up to your play.
Bieksa remains a top-four defenceman in the eyes of many. But I'd argue he stopped being a top-four defenceman last season, which means the Ducks will notice this right around the beginning of next season, when Juice's two-year, $8 million contract extension kicks in. He may turn out to be the Canucks' Trojan Horse.
Jake Virtanen causes an Oil spill (get it? because Oilers?)
Feel like staring at your computer screen for an hour? You know you do. And once you finally admit it to yourself, you should spend the majority of your screen time watching this, over and over:
Man. Virtanen had no intention of going for that puck. I like him.
This is my favourite Vine right now. It's just ahead of the DMX llama.
Derek Dorsett is David Pelletier
Speaking of loopy, loopable moments, here's Derek Dorsett getting all tangled up with Lauri Korpikoski, and inadvertently doing some beautiful ice dancing.
Best figure skating duo since Michaels & MacElroy? #EDMvsVAN pic.twitter.com/X0OtoSruzj
— Edmonton Oilers (@EdmontonOilers) October 19, 2015
What's really happening? They're stuck together like two dogs in heat, and Dorsett knows he's going down. but if he falls forward, Korpikoski's face is going right into the ice, and that's no good, so instead, he forces a rotation then falls backwards, cradling Korpikoski's head in his groin. Good thinking, Dorsett.
Break out the tinfoil hats
And finally, while we're talking about Canucks GIFs, a word Alex Burrows jumping into the St. Louis Blues' bench, a split-second of slapstick that's somehow turned into another stupid instance of Vancouver vs. the world: no, the NHL did not cut Burrows' fall into the bench to intentionally make him look bad. I know it seems like it, though, because Jason Botchford keeps saying it:
So why would the NHL edit the clip with the tag line “This happened for some reason last night?”
Could it be to embarrass a player who has a rep for diving?
Sure, I guess, if you really, really, really reach, and you're incessantly looking for instances where the league is out to get the Canucks. Or maybe it's because it's a weird-looking play, and "for some reason" has just become one of those Internet phrases we like to use when we talk about stuff we don't quite understand. (Why, I used it in a headline just the other day.)
You could argue, as Botchford did, that whoever made the GIF should have shown the whole play -- you know, contextualized it a little to spare us some hurt feelings before tweeting it out. But this is a GIF we're talking about. It's, like, two seconds, looped in perpetuity. I think we're okay sacrificing a little context there. And since when does anyone on Twitter care about context? That has not been my experience. On Twitter, context is the 141st character.
It's true that a handful of people brought their preconceived notions about Burrows to the GIF once they saw it, assuming he dove into the bench shouting "Shenanigans!" or something. (And let's be honest -- he may have whispered it to himself at some point, even if Jay Bouwmeester was slyly holding him down while also whispering "Shenanigans.") Fine. It wouldn't be the first time people weighed in on a situation without knowing all, or any, of the facts. But to suggest The NHL cut it to embarass Burrows and the Canucks -- when what really happened is their GIF guy just cut it so it'd be funny and get retweets -- is hot nonsense.
Anyway. Before this turns into #shapheat or whatever we're calling it these days, I think Botchford is an excellent beat writer, especially in the digital era. Even if he rips me in the next edition, his Provies will be a postgame must-read. I preemptively call uncle. But pushing this Burrows thing is silly.
