My ex-boyfriend has recently started contacting me again. A lot. He has been sending me explicit texts, asking me to hang out, and saying that he wants us to hook up and have sex. It's very bold and normally, I would just tell him to "go away" and leave it there.
However, I know he has a new girlfriend, who he has been serious and monogamous with for a long while. They even live together. A part of me wants to let her know what is going on. If I was her, I would want to know the truth and not be made a fool.
Am I being a meddler if I tell her?
If you tell her, you will have officially meddled, but in this case, it's probably a good thing. If he had sent you one or two texts, then I would just tell you to forget about it. But his text-flirting has been consistent and documented. Screen-cap those conversations. Keep any dick pics. You know the drill.
I had this friend. Let's call her Bella.
Bella was dating this unappreciative, drug-addled youngster for far too long. She took care of this fool, and it was her own fault for putting up with his immaturity, but at times, I think they had fun. The first time they broke up was because she found out he had cheated on her. She didn’t speak to him again for half a year, but somehow he weaseled his way back in.
Second time around, a common friend of both Bella and myself asked me if the two were still together because she had seen him out the other evening and he was acting shady. Our common friend didn't want to be a snitch, but she also didn't want Bella to get a disease or have to deal with one of the other cute little sidebars of irresponsible infidelity.
You know your ex-boyfriend, not me, but it sounds like he is a pile. (And I can say this because I have cheated. I WAS a pile. People can recover.)
It also sounds like he is not satisfied in his new relationship, or that he is one of those people who needs constant attention. Either way, it's not your problem and won't be again pretty soon.
When I cheated it was pathetic. I would always end up sleeping with my ex in some pathetic attempt to trick myself into believing they still validated my sexuality. I see now how deeply low this is, but at the time I was young, immature, and lacking confidence. Again, PILE.
Everyone is so accessible now. Find your ex's girlfriend on Facebook and, if you can’t access her personal email address, just write her a private message on there. (It may just go to her junk mail if you are not "friends" so email is best.) Be polite; you know, the whole "I just want to let you know in case" and "I am sorry about this," and let her know what is going on.
She may not thank you, or even believe you right away (you have those screen caps), but in the end, if he is trying to fuck you, he's probably already fucking with other girls in his back catalogue. No girlfriend deserves to be the butt of the joke.
