The Womanizer is a new sex toy that claims 50 per cent of women using it will orgasm in 60 seconds. Instead of using vibrations, the toy suctions onto your clitoris and stimulates using an air compression pump and a servomotor. With five levels of intensity, this "Pleasure Air" toy is designed to feel like oral sex. Pleasure Air technology is turning tongues into wind.
I tried The Womanizer, which is rare for me, a sex writer who is sent toys by the busload and rarely has time to lie around and masturbate with them all. Seriously, one giant drawer in my office is over flowing with them and I usually end up gifting them to friends for their feedback.
The Womanizer was speedy and soft, like the best oral sex after being devoid of good head for months. I did not orgasm in under a minute, but what fun would an orgasm be in less time it takes to fill up half your tank with gas? In no way would it replace a human, but for a toy, it provided its own breed of excellent head.
On Amazon, reviews for The Womanizer are glowing. Most are from men who bought the toy for their wives, either as a gift or in an attempt to cure sexual problems. One husband explained that since his wife started taking medication, her sex drive had been completely eliminated, and she had not orgasmed in six months. The Womanizer fixed that problem immediately. Another said he loved watching his wife use the toy even if it meant he was not that involved. Only one questioned if he could ever be replaced by The Womanizer.
"There is this myth about being replaced by the vibrator," says Dr. Shannon Chavez, a Los Angeles-based sex therapist. "I like to [tell couples] to bring the device into foreplay. Masturbation is one of the most important foreplay exercises for couples because things are usually so intercourse focused."
According to 2016 statistics, sex toys are a 15-billion-dollar-a-year industry with vibrator sales topping at 19.2 per cent (with dildos a close second at 16 per cent.) Back in 2009, a study was published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine that surveyed over 2,000 women ages 18 to 60 about their vibrator use. The researchers found that 52.5 per cent of participants have used a vibrator during solo masturbation, intercourse and with a partner during foreplay, and 83.8 per cent said they used their vibrators for clitoral stimulation. When asked about negative side affects like numbness, pain or irritation from vibrators, over 80 per cent answered "never" to each symptom.
"Anytime a client talks to me about having a pleasure based issue with a partner, or less interest in their partner, I always bring up masturbation," says Dr. Chris Donaghue, a Los Angeles-based sex therapist and psychologist. "Very few therapists bring this up, which I think is a huge problem. The question is always: what are the ways that you masturbate? Because if you masturbate consistently in ways that in no way mimic what a human being can do to you, you must be aware that you are possibly setting yourself up to need whatever form of masturbation it takes for you to get off. For example, women who use water under the faucet in the bathtub, awesome, but if that is consistently what works for you, then you are hard wiring your body to need that level of intensity to orgasm. If you want a more solo style of sexuality, then this is not a problem, but if you want to have partner sex and you are in a monogamous relationship then it is going to be very hard to have a human mimic that."
Another "hands-free, distraction-free" vibrator is the Eva, by Dame Products. The tiny little vibrator, which looks like a headless torso with arms, nestles in a woman's labia to provide the clitoral stimulation during sex. The whole point of this toy is that it takes on the job of clitoral stimulation so both people have their hands free to focus on intimacy. Don't products like this make things too easy?
"A lazy partner is an issue entirely separate from sex toys," says Dame Products chief of technology Janet Lieberman. "If your partner is concerned and involved in your sexual pleasure, using sex toys is not going to change that. It may even make it easier for them to add variety and free up more time for exploration."
Dr. Donaghue also points out that clitoral stimulation toys are particularly handy for those who do not fit into the box of healthy, thin and able-bodied. "We also have to consider different types of bodies, so people who are larger or people who are disabled," he comments. "That is why the [Eva] seems so great, even just thinking about someone with arthritis pain. It's beautiful on that level as well."
Dr. Chavez tries to get her clients to experiment with what she calls "vibrator priming," waking up those nerve endings in the genitals with a device.
"I'll have her use a vibrator to increase blood flow and improve orgasms, either alone or with her partner. I also recommend that a woman never use a vibrator in the same place all the time. Our bodies need variety. When you are conditioning the body's response you have to think of it like a massage with different pressures, speeds and areas."
Dr. Chavez says a toy like The Womanizer can act like a sex coach for oral sex techniques. "It's a great device," she comments. "I get my couples to try to mimic the techniques instead of licking around aimlessly. My couples learn a lot of information from vibrators, the anatomy and where a woman wants pleasure. Arousal for a woman takes time. Devices can provide a lot of learning and awareness. I don't think we have to be too concerned about using them too much or not enough. It's just about communication."
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