While sitting poolside in Joshua Tree a few months back, my friend (and fellow sex writer) Jane gave me her thoughts on “bush”. I don’t think I asked, but that’s how Jane is. I’m not complaining.
“I’m all about it,” she said. “I’m definitely pro-bush, but to an extent. It can be sexy, but I prefer to keep it trimmed around the butt and sides.” Jane was going for ‘70s-inspired wild with a clean, oral-friendly twist. I mean, how else do you describe that?
I don’t care so much about bush. The first time I waxed mine was when I was 27 and I only did it because my friend needed moral support to do hers again after a botched job when she was a teenager. The wax pulled out her skin and she was afraid to go back. We went to Sugarbox on Cambie and when the lady pulled out my hair it took all of three minutes.
“Next time, we rip you all out,” she said in her thick accent. “Brazilian.”
She mimicked ripping roots from soil with her hands.
“Easy.”
Ripping all my womanly hairs out to give me a child-like look? That Brazilian? I shuddered at the thought.
If you yourself have waxed or talked about waxing to any person in Western culture (or watched that episode of Sex and the City with Matthew McConaughey), you know about “The Brazilian”, a look made popular by the J Sisters. In 1994, the J Sisters decided that America needed to follow the strict beauty rules of their native Brazil. They started a salon in Manhattan, focusing on nail care, but it wasn’t long before they busted out the Brazilian wax.
The whole bald-vagina thing became huge. Some women were all about it. Others found it insane. Some sat in the middle and went “French” instead (like myself), but the J Sisters had changed the landscape of North American female body maintenance.
Now, apparently the J Sisters are breaking ground again with the vagina facial. Yes, a facial for your vagina.
According to Page Six and The Cut, the technical term is Gommage Therapy. Gommage is an ingredient used to exfoliate sensitive areas of your skin without that scratchy feeling that most scrubs provide (only the best for your vulva, duh).
Basically, the vagina facial removes dead skin from your vagina and helps prevent ingrown hairs.
But why all the maintenance on our lower regions? I’m no Mormon, but doesn’t that hair grow there for a reason? Isn’t that god damn science? Eyebrows have purpose. We don’t rip those out (not all of us, anyways), but why is the standard for grown women to keep our bushes at the level of a pre-teen’s?
The standard of bush styling is mainly generational. If you grew up gawking at ‘70s porn, you don’t want a Jesse Jane look, you want a little more jungle. It’s all about comfort, what we are accustom to. The bush is making a solid comeback. I don’t want to start trends here, but I think unrealistic minimalism is out. Plus, as a mostly straight woman, I know most men I have been with couldn’t care less about the hair, as long as cleanliness is in order. It’s more about hygiene than a hair cut.
My friend Dana made a good point: “Leave what YOU would want. Me, I don’t want that many pubes in my face.”
So, apparently now you can get a facial for your vulva. Smooth that thing down if you see fit. Fine. There’s always going to be a new trend to tell us women we aren’t okay just the way we came, but if there wasn’t something to strive for would beauty even be a “thing”?
I ask myself this every single day.
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