Valentines day is right around the corner and the general consensus is that most people are not looking forward to it. This occasion can sometimes feel forced with added pressure to really show how much you love your partner with grand romantic gestures. It's no wonder that most people have decided to boycott Valentines Day.
Even though most of us would agree that showing you love someone shouldn't be reserved for just one day, we are often afraid of what it says about our relationship if we don't. After all, it does feel lame when your friends ask you the next day what your partner did for you and you have to answer with not much to say.
Once you've found love, what does it take to keep the fire going? Really, isn't that what Valentines Day is all about? Keeping the fire going in your relationship is about being attentive to your partner. Often we begin to perceive our relationship as predictable. Even though it's helpful for you to know your partner well, it's often detrimental when it comes to romance because you can't see outside the box. Trying new things within both you and your partner's interest is the key.
For those of you who are single, Valentines Day can be a crude reminder that you don't have that special love in your life. However, I find that most people are feeling less like that since the number of single people is on the rise. If you're single, just remember that feeling loved is what's matters whether it's with a group of friends or your family.
While in New York this week at New York Fashion Week, I asked some people what they thought about Valentines Day and what they will be up to on that day. Here are their responses:
"I plan to relax for Valentines Day and maybe go for dinner with my boyfriend. I told him all I wanted was some words on paper for the occasion." -- Amanda from Connecticut
"Valentine's Day is overrated and contrived. I'm not really into it but if I had a girlfriend I would do something for her." -- Mike from Connecticut
"This is my fifth Valentine's Day with my boyfriend. We're not planning much but probably relax. I got him something he can use for work but I'm not much of a flowers girl. Chocolates are good though." -- Alex from Connecticut
"For Valentine's Day I'm taking her to watch a play and dinner. I know she loves plays and thought it would be a great idea." -- Kasonee from New York
"I'll actually be traveling on Valentine's Day. My boyfriend and I aren't big on it but we'll be exchanging gifts. Usually we do clothes for gifts or I really enjoy relaxation like a spa." -- Lindsay from Tennessee
"Honestly I feel like Valentine's Day is a little contrived. I shouldn't have to be forced to love someone on a designated day. What if I just want to hate them that day? I'm single and will probably grab some drinks with friends." -- Chris from New York
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Amy Yew is a researcher and therapist. Tell us what you think and submit any questions you have to [email protected]. You can also tweet your thoughts on Twitter @AmyYew.
