It used to be only during playoff season when our favorite NHL players would don their unruly man-beards. Forgive and forget was the unspoken rule because this trend had an expiry date. Gone are the days. Men have taken it upon themselves to make a universal decision for both sexes that it is now cool to sport an over-abundance of face fur even during the hottest months of the year. The “lumbersexual” is the latest outdoorsy trend to hit our city streets.
It comes as no surprise that the lumberjack is of Canadian origin, so is that the reason for its popularity here in the North? The trend has spread so fast and furiously that the lumbersexual beard can be seen on too many men throughout North America. Even men who would normally never consider anything but a close shave are finding themselves chomping at the bit to let it grow.
According to Greg Reamsbottom the lead singer of The Hairfarmers, it takes a minimum of six weeks to reach even a respectful length. It was in Grade 12 that Reamsbottom began to grow his own beard.
“The universe says facial hair is man’s natural state, so have hair,” he says. “Just be sure to wash it and yes, use shampoo but leave the beard crap for the hipsters.”
When asked what his wife thinks of kissing this lumbersexual, he says, “It’s like getting licked in the face by a sheepdog”.
Assess whether this outdoorsy man trend is right for you by drawing up a list of pros and cons. Be sure to consider your lover’s opinion in your decision as the growing out stage is more painful for your partner than for you. Some things to consider: Are you man enough to, A), look like a lumber jack everyday, B), regularly groom your jungle of facial hair, C), keep your beard clear of food and scraps, D), hit the woods and become a hermit for a minimum of six weeks while your beard gets to an acceptable length, and E), wear a flannel shirt to work.
Tanya and Mabel, two women responsible for shaving mustaches during Movember lay it on the table.
“The beard is here to stay, the ‘stache is yesterday.”
Based on this statement alone, men should run for the mountains and not return until their beards have past the prickly stage and are silky and soft to the touch. Only then are men allowed to come out of hermit status to showcase a forest of facial hair.
What grows in the forest should technically stay in the forest. For now, the lumbersexual beard is a statement and clearly makes men feel like they rule the true north strong and free. I guess the verdict is this: let it grow guys, but hibernate for a minimum of six weeks and prove you are worthy of sporting this mountain man look before you start strutting your stuff through the streets of Vancouver.
