Hello straight men. I am talking to you. Yes, I am usually talking to you. What do you think of pegging? You know what I'm talking about, right?
(Progressive, prostate-adventurous, freaky-why-be-hetero-normal-men, ignore this. I'm basically talking to the proverbial L7's out there.)
Pegging: When a woman straps on a dildo via a harness and penetrates her male partner in the asshole. Pegging! No, when lesbians do this it is not pegging. When gay men screw it is not pegging. These are just examples of good old fashioned queer sex. Pegging happens between two straight people.
I've never pegged a man. To be perfectly honest, I don't think I have the strength for it. I'm all butt and thighs, but I feel like being a killer on top means serious core strength and I just don't have it.
Plus, I'm a total bottom. I love being crushed. Believe me, I fuck back (ask any of my ex-boyfriends), but I really just want to feel as though I am being smoldered into dust. I don't go to therapy, so no, I don't know why. I also don't care. I like what I like.
I would assume that 80 per cent of the straight men out there think the idea of pegging is hideously scary, because if they wanted to be fucked in the ass they would have done it by now (it is 2014, after all). Straight men love to get a little milked in the asshole with a prostate massage, but the idea of a prosthetic penis making it's way deep in there is enough to make them celibate.
Stupid idiots. And you think you can just try to slip your dick into our buttholes without asking and we'll bend over and giggle?
Just like every dude is not into anal penetration, neither is every woman. Let's just say, people deserve a warning before anal sex or else you might as well be Carl Panzram, sodimizing men on trains and slitting their throats.
A friend of mine has experience with pegging (personally and some professionally) and works as a dominatrix. She recommends three essential tools: Quality lube, a leather harness (plastic is not as flexible or breathable), and letting the one being penetrated chose the dildo (wouldn't it be so rad if women were babied this sweetly before anal sex?).
"I feel like culture in general has become a bit more open, particularly in regard to sexual fetishes, which has allowed people to feel safe to explore things that were deemed unacceptable and even illegal in the past," she said. "It's possible that more gender-inclusive feminism is a contributing factor. Perhaps some men are starting to feel less pressure to maintain unrealistic expectations regarding their masculinity and gender roles.
"However, I've been approached by men in the past whose desire to be pegged stems from wanting to understand how it feels to be a woman," she noted. "While I appreciate these genuine and even noble attempts at understanding the opposite sex, I've had to point out several times that being penetrated is not what defines a woman."
Respect.
So, I ask men this week. Do you dare to peg?
Email Mish with your own sex questions and queries at [email protected]. You can also follow her on Twitter at @myszkaway
