With the overwhelming amount of year-end lists and round-ups, it's hard not to feel that last-week-of-the-year-blues leading up to New Year’s Eve. We are all selfish piles of crap who smile on the outside while tears of self pity rain down under our skin.
Get a grip, guys. It’s really too bad that this year you went through a brutal break-up, lost your job, failed the bar exam and crashed your sister's Prius into a school bus full of disabled children. However, 2016 is a new year, so after the stroke of midnight you should be wiping the slate clean, not smearing it with your bullshit from 2015. When you find yourself drunk on champagne and surrounded by your seemingly happy, celebrating friends, you could be tempted to retort into your iPhone to reconcile your blunders of 2015.
Text to the ex
Whether you did the dumping or got dumped, there is bound to be some unfinished business between you and your ex. Break-ups are never a mutual affair, no matter how many lies you each tell yourselves.
Neither of you want the same thing and that's why you broke up. New Year’s Eve's midnight kiss is almost worse for singles than Valentine’s Day, because even if you are running around hugging and kissing all your friends, there is that moment where the 12:00am kiss happens. If you lack that special someone in a room full of happy couples, you may be tempted to text the person who's heart you crushed back in June.
What are they doing? Are they sad and high like you? And who the hell is that strange person you have never seen before now suddenly all over their Instagram account? All of these questions should be considered void once the first 60 seconds of 2016 has passed.
Text to the friend you had a falling out with
The friendship break-up is tragic and should not be something that one experiences frequently (if so, you may want to start looking inside, instead of "leaning in”). Losing a friend in a final blow out is really sad and can leave both parties wanting to apologize and start fresh. However, a text is not the way to do it. Wait until 2016, really think about it, and reach out offering face-to-face communication. That's what grown ups do.
Text to the boss
Why do you even still have your boss’s number? She fired you for abusing the company contacts to gather investors for your online cupcake business. Not on work time, remember? She hates you and the last thing she wants to do is get a drunken New Year's text from coy little you, begging for forgiveness. If you want to send a funny prank text, that's fine. Just remember to use a phone of someone who won't throw you under the bus when the boss responds in a few days.
Text to the booty call you abandoned
If you want to start the new year laying naked next to a person you swore off in August, that's your problem, but I highly doubt you do. Time traveling to the future is fun, but the recent, pathetic past is for your nightmares. What kind of cool relics will you find repeating your own mistakes? Again, you abandoned this person for a reason and it is most likely because, beyond their naked body, they are a wet mop of annoying. Save yourself the remorseful regret and don't send that text.
