Good morning, 2017. Can you believe we made it? I can. I’ve heard far too many people whining about how 2016 was “the worst” or that they are “so over 2016.” Get a grip. Life sucks if you make it that way. Mercury in retrograde is not the reason you blew it; you are. You should have gone to a therapist that practices Cognitive Behavioural Therapy instead of just talking at a professional who offers nothing more than a half smile.
In the spirit of a new year, let’s not dwell on the past and look toward the future. This year has so much potential! It’s like a newborn baby, doe-eyed and cooing, just ready to be absorbed with all of our neuroses. What a gorgeous thing hitting restart can be. Here are some tips to help you have a great 2017.
Work out when you want
Everyone pigs out over the holidays and then swears to a new workout and diet routine the minute the clock strikes midnight. Well, guess what? Like quitting cocaine or smoking, you aren’t going to do it unless you really want to. If you don’t want to work out, then fine – don’t. If you do, I suggest taking to it 100 per cent. The only thing that helped me was seeing a personal trainer. I don’t have the discipline to got go to the gym on my own; I need someone to guilt-trip me into getting there and going for it. It’s just like dance class when I was a kid: I never wanted to go until I got there, then I had a blast. Vancouver has some incredible boot camps, and one of the best personal trainers around is Michelle Ford of Peak Power. Full disclosure: She’s a good friend of mine, but even when we just trail ran together and did boot camp, she kept me inspired and fit with encouragement and challenging workouts.
Don’t diet
Dieting is dumb. Changing your eating habits is good. It’s all in the phrasing. Starving yourself for a month only works if you have some important event to attend. If you want to keep the weight off forever, you have to go full lifestyle change. It’s not that hard; I’ve done it. Moderation is key. You don’t have to give up baguettes for life or never drink vodka again, but don’t live off mini-pizzas and sushi. This leads to my next suggestion…
Go domestic
If you want to eat healthier, you have to cook at home. Sorry, guys, that’s just the breaks. Learning to cook is total freedom. I just made my own ricotta cheese before I sat down to write this. You know how long it took and how much it cost? About 40 minutes and $2.70.. Once you get some good cookbooks and learn the basics, cooking becomes something to look forward to. Buy a Martha Stewart book and The Fanny Farmer Cookbook, watch Chopped and embrace everything “from scratch.”
Say yes
Don’t be a slug. Say yes to things you’re invited to. I am the queen of being a flake, but I always try to say yes to any strange request that requires my presence. Even if it’s totally insane, you’ll have a weird story to tell until you die.
Get off of Instagram
You don’t even have to delete your account; just delete your app for a week or so every now and then. Think of it as a Instagram Cleanse. The real world is so much more exciting. If you are a true addict and can’t let go, limit your scrolling time and only do it while you’re on the toilet. Speaking of social media, try restraining from long-winded political Facebook posts. Hasn’t “Facebook Memories” taught us anything yet?
Connect with your elders
Your grandparents, parents, aunts and uncles will die one day, as will all of us. Instead of just depositing the birthday cheques they so graciously give you, try spending time with them. Have you ever sat down for a one-on-one and questioned your mother about her teenage years or old boyfriends? What she wanted to do had you not popped out and tied her down? Open a bottle of wine and get to talking.
