There is nothing more depressing at the end of summer than the arrival of things that signify the end of summer: crappy weather, back-to-school ads, pants and, worst of all, pumpkin spice lattes. The caffeinated abomination is so popular that is has even been trademarked by Starbucks (PSL) and has its own Twitter account (@TheRealPSL), which recently informed its nearly 86,000 followers that Starbucks would be getting its pumpkin on as early as this week.
Besides the obvious question of what kind of person would follow a Twitter account for Starbucks’ Pumpkin Spice Lattes — the answer being the same type of person who would debase themselves by ordering and consuming what is essentially the equivalent of liquid potpourri — we wonder why Starbucks feels the need to kill summer for the rest of us.
Just a few more weeks is all we’re asking. Enough to get a few more swims in, maybe a camping trip or barbecue. Then Starbucks can get down to the ugly business of imposing its nutmeg, cinnamon, ginger, cloves and allspice-scented reign of terror on everyone. God help us all.
