I live in Los Angeles, so I never see the winter holidays coming anymore. I only realized Christmas was creeping up because I went to a movie and had to walk through the outdoor mall grounds. Fake snowmen and reindeer look stupid when it’s so warm out that you’re wearing a T-shirt after 10pm. Christmas is about family, food and booze, but it’s also about friends – and some of your friends may be too cheap to spend money on sex toys. So boost their spirits this holiday season with a little luxury silicone.
LELO ‘MIA 2’
I love when a personal essential masquerades as a lipstick. It’s good company for your purse and easy to sneak around. One of my favourite blades came in a lipstick case. (I got it at a gas station in Florida, of course.) I believe every girl needs a knife and a vibrator, and it’s even better if both are hiding in lipstick. The Mia 2 is an updated version of the mini lipstick vibrator; it’s USB rechargeable and super-powerful despite its discreet size and shape. This is the perfect starter vibrator. Lelo.com
LELO ‘HEX’ condoms
HEX is the perfect gift for all your slutty friends. The average condom has not changed in decades, but after seven years of testing and research, LELO invented this revolutionary condom that WILL NOT BREAK. You heard me. LELO redesigned the dome into a honeycomb-like pattern to prevent unfortunate breakage. "HEX was inspired by the engineering principle that everything that is light and strong needs to be built with structure,” explains chief marketing officer Steve Thomson. "Like a suspension bridge or graphene (the strongest material in the world), HEXTM has a honeycomb design that allows the condom to be ultra-thin yet extremely strong. Even if the latex is punctured, the shape helps contain breakage to one secluded HEXTM hexagon, rather than the entire condom, to protect you and your partner." Lelo.com
Intimate Melody ‘Lana 3 in 1’ vibrator set
Sex toys aren’t cheap, and sometimes it’s really tough to throw down a couple hundred bucks on something you could do with your hand. That’s why the well-priced Intimate Melody line is a win for those of us too cheap to splurge on sex. The Lana 3 in 1 is a bullet vibrator set made from medical-grade silicone – a perfect gift for first-time users, and a very decent variety pack. IntimateMelody.com
The Dame ‘Eva’
The Eva is one of the most practical toys on the market. Free of bells, whistles and bullshit, this little egg-like vibrator tucks under the labia, stimulating her clitoris during sex. Think of it as a third arm with wings. Are you one of those girls who just “can’t get there” from penetration alone? This toy is perfect for you. It does the work, so no one else has to. When I spoke to L.A.-based sex therapist and psychologist Dr. Chris Donoghue about the Eva, he also noted, “We have to consider different types of bodies… people who are larger or people who are disabled. That is why the [Eva] is so great. Even think about someone with arthritis pain – it’s beautiful on that level as well.” I highly recommend this for anyone – especially those who complain about her partner not “finishing the job”. DameProducts.com
We-Vibe ‘Sync’
We-Vibe is a Canadian sex-toy brand that makes revolutionary and interactive toys for solo and couple play. Its signature couple toy, Sync, is one of the best. It’s made from waterproof, body-safe (free from harmful phthalates) silicone and connects to an app on your phone, so you can toy with her from across the country. The Sync is shaped perfectly to hook into her, for intensified pleasure for you both. And the remote control makes it super-easy to use. Like the Eva, it comes in “aqua” or purple. (What’s with sex toys and winter colours?) We-vibe.com/sync
